|Disclaimer||This fan fiction is based on the Rurouni Kenshin manga. Rurouni Kenshin characters are the property of creator Nobohiro Watsuke, Shueisha, Shonen Jump, Sony Entertainment, and VIZ Comics. This is a non-profit work for entertainment purposes only. Permission was not obtained from the above parties.|
|Author Intro||Teaser: Did Kenshin's fight with Shishio have an unseen audience? Come join the fun as deceased RK characters root for their favorite fighter. If you liked LOTR:JS, you'll love this!|
Warning: Spoilers up to the end of the Kyoto arc and the first OVA (and just a touch of the Christian arc). Much OOC. All respective rights belong to Nobuhiro Watsuki-sama.|
Mwa ha ha ha! I'm evil! Truly evil! *Is suddenly Gatotsu-ed* Urk!
|Author's page ::: Post a review at FFnet ::: Main fan fic index|
::: Minimal Christian arc
by April-san ::: 04.Dec.2002
The fight was about to start and Okita sat on a high wall, kicking his feet, watching as Shishio and Kenshin took their places on the field.
"Here you are."
Okita smiled at the newcomer, stopping his kicking for just a moment. "Ah, konnichi wa, Kondo-san."
The older man took a seat next to the youngster. "Who do you think is going to win?"
He shrugged. "Who knows. I'm here to support Saito-san."
"Saito. What an Ahou."
Both men turned to a scowling Hijikata.
"So," snorted Kondo, "you finally decided to make it this time."
"I wouldn't miss this for the world." His stone cold exterior allowed not even a glimmer of emotion onto his face.
"And who are you rooting for?"
"Hmmm…" Hijikata scanned the field. "That one." He pointed.
"Uh, Hijikata-san, his name is Hoji. He's not going to fight. He has a hard time fighting a cold." Okita smiled and continued to kick his feet.
"Oh." Again he scanned the field. "So, I get to choose from the dark haired woman, the guy all in bandages, the red-haired girl, and that tall skinny guy who looks like a moron?"
He rolled his eyes.
Kondo laughed. "That one is not a woman."
"Of course she is. I can see her cleavage from here."
"Not that one. The red haired one."
"That's the one I'm talking about."
Okita stopped his kicking, a grin on his lips. "The red haired one is the Hitokiri Battousai."
"Noo! You're kidding me. You're…NOT…kidding?! You, Saito, and Nagakura lost against that?!" He shook his head. "I'm very embarrassed. Okita, commit seppuku."
"Nanni?! But…but…I'm already dead!!"
"That's no excuse to not follow my orders."
"Why can't you leave the boy alone and let him watch the fight?" All eyes rose to a dark haired man with a red headband.
"Hello, Captain Sagara-san." Okita quickly climbed from the ledge. "Did you bring what I asked of you?"
"Right here." He pulled from behind his back two twelve packs.
"Yatta! Thank you, Captain Sagara-san. I always seem to get carded." He quickly grabbed a can and returned to his place on the ledge, once again kicking his feet.
Hijikata looked up as he grabbed a can for himself. "So, who are you supporting?" He winced as he looked down. "Is biting legal?"
Sagara shrugged. "The kid down there with the pointy hair would be awfully disappointed if I didn't support him."
"Seriously?" Kondo asked over his shoulder. "Want to make a small bet on that?"
"Of course not. The kid needs all the help he can get. He'll probably end up dying after he trips and falls of the roof on his way to fight. Seriously, I'm cheering for the one with all that cleavage."
"That one." He points to the field, but no one is able to follow his line of sight. "The female one. The cute one. She's a little short, but…but…why are you all staring at me like that?"
"That is my Battousai, and if someone could toss me one of those cans..." Again, all eyes turned to the most recent addition to their group. Tomoe sat against a side wall and sadly shook her head at the field. "Even after all these years, he still looks like a little girl…" And, with a little sigh, she popped the top of her can and drank deeply.
Sagara shook his head. "But she sure has some big…wait. You said he."
He shook his head. "I think I need glasses." He squinted at the field, then wandered to the far wall and began to pound his head against it.
"Jinei Udoh-san. I didn't see you over there. Welcome," announced Okita.
As usual, Jinei sat to one side of the group, pouting.
Tomoe quickly went to his side. "So, when are you going to pay up? Every time, every time you keep saying Battousai is going to 'bite the big one' this time, but, hmm…isn't that him down there…still breathing?"
"You know, I do feel a little sorry for you. Just a little, that is. How about we reverse our bets this time? If he lives, you win. If he dies, I win."
Jinei's eyes grew large. "Really?"
"Is it a bet?"
"GURIEN KAINA!!" a voice echoed from the field.
Jinei's jaw dropped as he saw the action below. "No. It…It…NOOOO!!"
Tomoe walked away with the smallest of smiles on her face.
Sagara glanced to the field. "Whoa! How'd that babe get topless…oh. That's that guy, isn't it?"
Okita let out a deep sigh. "I didn't think it would end this quickly."
Kondo patted the young man on the back. "He didn't have a chance unless that bandaged guy had some kind of time limit or something like that, anyway."
"Well, it's not fair! He had to fight two people just to get here. If he was going to die, he should have died fighting the character based on me!" Okita started his own pouting.
Hijikata took a glance at the field and just held his can. "So," he asked absently, "what's the score?"
Kondo pointed. "Look! It's Saito!" The three former Shinsengumi started to cheer wildly. Yet, after a moment, the three faces held similar expressions of disbelief as Saito hit the ground and did not move.
The three turned as one to scowl at the newcomer. "And you are…?"
The man held his head up proudly, his eyes covered by a cloth. "Usui. The Blind Sword Usui formerly of the Juppongatana. But my friends call me Tinkerbell."
Okita winced. "Ano…Usui-san…you are the newest member of our little club. Rules state you bring the snacks."
Usui made a face, disappeared, then appeared with an armful of cellophane bags.
"Corn curls are mine!"
"I'll take the cheesy puffs!"
"Next time try a party sub. They go very well around here."
"Everyone, be quiet!" shouted Sagara. "My kid is…is…uh. Oh well. Never mind. Pass me another can."
"Uh oh. Don't look now, everyone," warned Tomoe, "but here comes the Aoshi Fan Club. Ooo. They brought chili cheese dip! Guys, you are a little late."
Beshimi, Hyottoko, and Skikjo nodded and glared at Hannya. "Someone," Beshimi pointed at Hannya, "took way too much time getting ready."
"I couldn't help it." Hannya shook his head. "Every outfit seemed to just clash with this mask and I just don't look good in stripes. What we miss?"
Kondo didn't take his eyes off the field. "It looks like Shishio is winning."
Skikjo grinned. "That means we missed the Battousai's speech?"
"Yep," Okita chirped.
"That's great! Aaaahh! Aoshi-sama!!!" The previous display from the Shinsengumi was nothing compared to the cheers of the Oniwabanshu. They pulled out black and gray pom-poms, We Love Aoshi beer cups, and huge foam fingers which read Aoshi is #1.
Kondo poked Okita and whispered, "These guys really need to get a life."
Hijikata took a quick glance at the field and his jaw dropped. "I like this guy. Hey. Fearsome foursome, have any openings in that fan club of yours?" Hijikata was quickly inducted into the club with a can of beer over his head and stuffed into a T-shirt which read Kaiten Kenbu Rokuren Rules!!
The entire group became suddenly very silent. Okita had his arm up, pointing at the field, mouth wide open.
Sagara confusedly shook his head and looked at the field. "Holy cow! Take it off!! Take it all off, Baby!! Uh…wait. It's that guy again, isn't it?"
Jinei swore. "Drat. I thought he bit the big one this time. Darn that Battousai!"
Tomoe stuck her hand in front of Jinei. "Time to pay up. Looks like he's alive."
Grumbling, Jinei handed her a pile of yen notes. He blinked. "Hey! Wait just a minute! I thought we--"
With a giggle, Tomoe skipped away, holding the money close to her.
"Get back here you…you…!!"
"Look!" cried Sagara. "Sanosuke is awake!"
"So is Saito!" cheered Okita. "Go Saito! Shinsengumi are tops!!"
"Pass the chili cheese dip!"
"Yum! This is even better than that spinach spread you made last time!"
"Yep, good old Mom's secret recipe."
"Look at the beating Shishio is taking! Ouch. That one is going to hurt tomorrow."
"What is the point spread?"
"Is anyone else actually cheering for Shishio? Usui?"
"Just thought I'd ask."
"This fight seems to be going on forever."
"It seems a lot longer than half an hour!"
"Look! They're getting ready to do their Ogis, their final attacks!"
"Aww. They've stopped to talk, again. Get this over with!! You two talk more than a couple of teenaged girls!!"
"Looks like the Battousai is in trouble!!"
"Help him Aoshi-sama!"
"Don't just stand there, you morons!!"
Popcorn flew and all eyes were glued to the field. Everyone's face turned blue, their breath caught in their throats.
Jinei burst into tears as the second part of the Amakakeru Ryu no Hirameki hit Shishio. "Noo! No! No! No! No!!"
"Humph. That was kinda anti-climatic."
Okita sighed and shook his head. "Well, it's all over now."
"Not really." Tomoe slyly watched the action below. "Is it just me, or does this scene look awfully familiar?"
Sagara's eyes grew large. "Holy Sh-!!"
"Welcome Yumi-san to our little gathering." Tomoe held out her hand to the figure that appeared before them. "It's about time we get another female here."
Usui stuck out his tongue. "Na na! You get to bring the snacks next time!"
Yumi blinked and put one hand to her head. "Shishio…sama…?"
"He's not looking well down there." Tomoe patted her on the head. "He should be joining us, soon. In the meantime, try some of this chili cheese dip. It's great!"
Sagara whistled. "You're almost as hot as that red-head down there."
Okita handed her a can with a smile. "Sometimes this helps."
"Yep. You need it. And I need another one."
"It's not over yet! Look! He's starting to smoke! He's-"
A bright flash illuminated everyone's face.
"I don't get it."
"So is this a Battousai win by default?"
"He caught fire? That guy should have a warning label."
"Another today! I would never have thunk it."
"Welcome, Shishio Makoto-san." Okita greeted him with a smile.
"Ah…" He scratched the back of his head. "Iie. Okita Soushi desu. Actually, I'm the Shinsengumi Squad One Leader. We're bitter enemies." As he spoke, he had a huge grin on his face. "But, I'm also the organizer of this group. Someone toss him a can."
A long silent pause.
"AAAAA!!! We're out of cans!!"
"It's been great!"
Usui let out a great sigh. "Shishio. Yumi. We're all going to the same place, so let me show you the way." The three of them disappeared.
One by one, or in small groups, the spirits began to disappear.
"I can't believe how late it is!"
The four original members of the Aoshi Fan Club picked up an obviously drunk Hijikata who was now wearing his T-shirt as a toga and chanting a samurai drinking song. As they hoisted him onto their shoulders, they disappeared.
"So, when is the next fight?"
Okita flipped open his schedule. "The next big fight will be against a…Amakusa Shogo. It's just a one on one against Battousai-san." He sighed.
Jinei stuck his finger in front of Tomoe. "Enough playing around! This time I bet Battousai wins! I need to make some of the money I lost back!"
Tomoe threw her hands in to the air. "Okay. Okay. But, if he looses, you owe me big time."
Jinei chuckled. "Like that's ever going to happen." The two of them disappeared.
Kondo found himself alone with Okita who was only staring at the burning battlefield. "You know Saito made it out of there alive. Or he would have joined us like Shishio and Yumi did."
"Then why so down in the dumps?"
Okita sighed. "I'm always the one who has to clean up this mess!"
"Come on, boy." Kondo ruffled the young man's hair. "I'll help."
|Endnotes||Anyone who reviews gets a Kaiten Kenbu Rokuren Rules T-shirt! *wink wink* And, if you didn't get the joke, the character Aoshi is based on Hijikata and Soujirou is based on Okita. I live close enough to Green Bay (Packer Country) to get weekly doses of this during football season, whither I want it or not (just in case you wanted to know where I got the ideas *sigh*). Thank you for reading (and hopefully reviewing or I'll sic Shishio on you).|
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