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Broken Pieces: Chapter 5 - sympathize

by linay

I am consumed by the night.

Consumed by their hate

Consumed by their blood lust

Kenshin and Takasugi stared, dumbfounded, at Genji. The dark-haired assassin stared back, clutching at his head in pain. Genji looked confused, lost and very, very angry.

“What do you mean, you idiot?” Kenshin fairly snarled at the dazed man.

“What the fuck do you think I mean, Battousai?” Genji growled back angrily, “I want to know who the hell that girl is, why she’s screaming her bloody head off and what the hell I’m doing in this shitty room!”

“You mean,” Takasugi interrupted the assassins’ death glare calmly, “You don’t remember?”

“Remember what, you shaggy freak?” Genji spat, “Dammit!”

A deep growl emanated from Kenshin’s chest as he began to advance on Genji angrily. He was stopped by a firm hand on his shoulder.

“Don’t,” Takasugi ordered quietly.

Kenshin turned back. “You believe him?” he questioned incredulously.

Takasugi shrugged in response. Then he pointed at Kaoru who was quivering in the corner, shaking her head wildly and looking as if she would break out in another round of screams at any moment.

“Do something about the girl first.”

Kenshin shot one last death glare at Genji and turned towards Kaoru. She was taking deep breaths and clutching at her chest. She continued shaking her head, as if there was something she wanted to shake out of herself. As Kenshin got closer to her slowly, she turned to look at him with her glazed eyes. Her face twisted between an angry snarl and a plea for help.

In one swift move, Kenshin swept her off her feet and carried her out of the room. Ignoring her fitful attempts to escape from his rough grip on her, he carried her down the hall to the bathroom. Behind him, Takasugi emerged, pushing Genji along. Raising a hand, he silenced the men who were throwing vulgar taunts at Kenshin’s retreating back. With a grim smirk, he waved his hand towards the door. The men, understanding the meaning of the gesture quite clearly, sobered up and headed for the door. Takasugi, second in command of their elusive organization, pulled a set of keys from around his neck and unlocked the door for them. When the last of the rowdy visitors had left, Takasugi pushed Genji out unceremoniously and shut and re-locked the door. Then, pressing his lips together in a cynical smirk, he headed for the bathroom.

Kenshin kicked the bathroom door open and surveyed the tub full of lukewarm water that Kaoru had neglected to drain. Still grasping a kicking Kaoru in his arms, he strode quickly to the tub. Without a word, he brusquely dropped Kaoru into the tub, the cool water splashing around noisily. At once, Kaoru inhaled sharply and started to jump up again. Tightening his lips, Kenshin grabbed her by the shoulders and pushed her completely under the water, releasing her as soon as her head went under. He pushed up the sopping sleeves of his black sweater and watched as Kaoru surfaced, coughing and sputtering, from the water, pushing back dripping strands of hair from her face.

Kenshin stood back with his hands on his hips, waiting to see her eyes. Kaoru blinked rapidly, still wiping the dripping water from her forehead. Kenshin watched her eyes intently and noted with satisfaction that they were no longer strangely glazed over.

Takasugi chose that moment to waltz into the bathroom, a toothpick protruding from the corner of his mouth. He grinned widely, also noting the change in Kaoru’s demeanour.

“Good work, Himura-kun,” Takasugi said, slapping Kenshin on the back.

Kenshin remained impassive, still staring down at the shivering teenager. Kaoru, starting to notice her surroundings and situation, quickly folded her arms over her chest. The thin robe was soaked through and the flimsy material clung to her skin, showing every detail of her body.

“What did you do to Genji?” Kenshin demanded in a low voice, “And how did you know the name Battousai?”

Kaoru glared up at him, her eyes flashing angrily. “Why won’t you leave me alone?”

Kenshin’s eyes narrowed into slits. “I demand to know.”

Takasugi simply leaned against the doorframe, watching their interaction with interest. The wide grin never left his face.

“Just leave me alone!” Kaoru shouted, angrily flinging water at him. She covered her face with her hands, hunching over in the water.

“Get out of the water,” Kenshin commanded.

Kaoru looked up from her hands. “Are you insane?” she argued irately, “With the two of you old perverts in here?”

Kenshin glowered down at the difficult girl. “Get out!” he repeated, anger seeping into his voice.

“Make me,” Kaoru hissed at him.

Kenshin stepped furiously towards the bathtub, his eyes scowling with fury. Reaching down, he hoisted her up by her upper arm. Kaoru protested angrily and attempted to wrench herself from his iron-like grip. One foot slipped on the slippery ceramic of the tub and her weight was transferred to the other foot all at once. Kaoru cried out suddenly in pain, reaching down for her injured ankle and falling forward.

Kenshin caught the girl in the crook of his arm as she fell forward. He dragged her from the tub and, with his free arm, pulled a towel from the rack and wrapped it around her shoulders. Kaoru inhaled sharply and pulled back from him, clutching at the ends of the towel around her. She faltered, pain shooting up her calf and she winced. Kenshin grabbed her by the shoulders and steadied her in place. Kaoru looked up into his face, surprise registering in her features. Kenshin stepped away, hopelessly brushing the water from his sweater. He opened a mirrored closet and pulled a long, terry cloth bathrobe from a hangar. He extended the bathrobe to her with one arm. She stared at him blankly. She crossed her arms over her chests as tightly as she could and huddled under the large towel.

Takasugi chuckled loudly, breaking the tension. “Ah,” he laughed aloud, “It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a modest girl. I’ll be waiting for the two of you in the living room.” He waved over his shoulder and left the bathroom.

Kaoru pulled the bathrobe from Kenshin’s fingers gingerly. “Well,” she said, glaring at him, “Aren’t you going?”

“No.”

“And you expect me to change?” she demanded, her voice rising a notch.

“Yes,” he replied with a severe stare, “And hurry it up too.”

Kaoru felt her hair practically rise in anger. “You,” she stammered incoherently, “Insufferable, inconsiderate-” She nearly stamped her foot. “Why won’t you let me change in peace?”

“Because,” Kenshin said, glaring at her, his eyes mere slits, “You’ll lock the door and won’t come out until I leave. Then I’ll never get any answers.”

She opened and closed her mouth, struck speechless. That was, in fact, exactly what she had been planning. Kenshin frowned at her threateningly and turned his back to her swiftly.

“So change,” he commanded, “Now.”

“Don’t turn around,” she warned him, dropping the towel to the floor.

“Who do you take me for?” Kenshin snorted, “I’m not that fool Genji.”

Kaoru slipped from the pink bathrobe as quickly as she could. Glancing furtively at the man in front of her, she pulled on the terry cloth bathrobe tightly. Kenshin turned around as soon as she had finished tying the knot. Another glaring contest ensued.

“Lovebirds,” Takasugi bellowed from the living room, “There’s no time for a quickie. Get the hell out here!”

Kaoru turned red up to the roots of her hair. Kenshin arched an eyebrow and turned towards the door. He marched into the main living area. Kaoru followed at a slower pace, wrapping her arms around herself protectively. Kenshin sat, leaning back into his armchair, and Takasugi was sprawled out on the couch. The two men watched the girl as she hesitantly sat, drawing her knees under herself, in the armchair nearest the fireplace.

Kenshin opened his mouth to demand information but Takasugi beat him to it.

“So,” Takasugi drawled, “Want to tell us what happened?”

Kaoru glared at the man, anger mounting.

“You knew,” she hissed, “You set the damn thing up.”

Takasugi leaned back with a smirk. “Maybe I did; maybe I didn’t. But now I want to know what you did and how you did it.”

“Why should I tell you?”

“You’re in our possession, we already saw what happened in there and you don’t really have anything to lose anyway,” he counted off the reasons on his long fingers, “So why don’t you just make it easy on yourself?”

Kenshin looked from Takasugi to Kaoru and then back again, clenching his fists. Something was passing between the two that he couldn’t grasp.

Sensing the battle aura beginning to rage around the assassin, Takasugi rolled his head over to look at Kenshin. “Himura, wouldn’t you like to know what happened?”

“Yes,” Kenshin said dangerously, “What did you do and how did you know my name?”

Kaoru’s eyes did not leave Takasugi’s face. “Why don’t you tell him, Takasugi-san,” Kaoru said curtly, “Since you already know what is going on?”

Takasugi smiled widely. “Ah, but it would be so much more enlightening if you would,” he purred.

“But you would know all about what happened tonight, wouldn’t you?” she drawled sarcastically, “So you should do the honours.”

Takasugi paused for a moment and changed strategies. He could feel Kenshin’s patience quickly wearing thin.

“My dear,” he said with a false frown, “I didn’t know you were one to use your ability so flippantly.”

Kaoru’s eyes widened as she glared angrily at him. “You dare,” she said through clenched teeth, “The man was going to…to RAPE me. And you dare-”

“He was one of ours,” Takasugi interrupted harshly. “Granted,” he added thoughtfully, “A stupid member - but nonetheless, one of ours. And you,” he said, pointing, “Did something to him - what exactly was it?”

Kaoru narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously. “Who told you? How did you find out about me?”

Takasugi clucked his tongue and chided, “I am the one asking the questions here, sweetheart.”

Kaoru gritted her teeth. “I will tell you nothing,” she declared.

“I suggest you explain yourself,” Kenshin’s cold voice came from across the living area.

“Ask your boss if you want an explanation!” Kaoru shot him an angry glare and spat, “I owe you nothing.”

Kenshin rose from his seat slowly. “Explain it to me now. Explain what you did to Genji. Explain what happened to you. Explain how you knew my name. Now.”

Kaoru snorted and looked away. Kenshin walked slowly around the coffee table and towards her chair, his cold fury mounting with each step.

“I would advise you to speak,” he warned in a deadly whisper.

Kaoru closed her eyes and kept her head turned away from him. Kenshin reached down and grabbed a handful of Kaoru’s hair, pulling her upwards painfully.

“Tell me now, you freak,” he hissed, shaking her head by her hair, “Tell me now or I will slit your throat.”

“Then kill me!” she cried suddenly, refusing to open her eyes, enraged tears spilling over her cheeks, “Kill me already and get it over with! I don’t care what you want to know. I don’t care how you intend to use me. I won’t help you! I won’t be your tool!”

Kenshin threw her back against the chair roughly. He walked around to the mantle and pulled the short sword from its rack. He angrily tossed the sheath away and came back around to loom above Kaoru. He reached down again and grasped a handful of her hair, pulling her head back viciously.

“Talk,” he ordered coldly, levelling the tip of the sword to the juncture between her chin and neck.

Kaoru shook her head silently from within his brutal grasp, forcing herself to stop the whimper of pain.

“Talk!” Kenshin shouted, drawing the tip of the blade from her ear to her neck.

“Why do you care? Why do you need to know?” she exploded angrily, desperately trying to wrench her head from his grasp, “You’re only a tool anyway. A blind, pathetic, unthinking tool!”

Kenshin gripped her hair tighter, as his eyes widened and his teeth clenched in anger.

“Yes,” Kaoru laughed bitterly, “I saw what you do. I saw what you are through that pervert’s eyes. You murder and rape and you enjoy it! You crave blood. You are a blank, emotionless machine who can’t think for yourself and-”

Her barrage of words was stopped suddenly as Kenshin flung her forcefully to the floor by her hair.

“Shut up,” he hissed.

“Why?” Kaoru sneered, trying to ignore the pain, “Because you can’t face what you are? Because you’re a shallow, cruel killer like that pervert?”

“I am nothing like that idiot!” Kenshin erupted, flinging the sword angrily. The short sword flew from his hand and embedded itself into the wall.

Silence covered the room, except for Kenshin’s heavy breathing. “I am nothing like that idiot,” he repeated in a low hiss, “You don’t know anything about me, bitch.”

“And you,” Kaoru whispered, clenching her fists in the thick fabric of the carpet and letting her tears fall from her downcast face, “You don’t know anything about me at all.”

“I know that you-” Kenshin began angrily.

“That I’m a freak? You know that I’m a freak? Is that it?” Kaoru yelled suddenly, looking up with eyes brilliant with furious tears, “Do you think I wanted the memories of that stupid, violent, disgusting assassin? But it was the only way to stop him. Do you think I wanted to see how he kills people, how he relishes their pain?”

She closed her eyes and shook her head wildly, tears flying from her eyes. “Do you know what a rat sees? Well I do. They made me take the memory of a rat - all for one of their stupid experiments. Do you think I asked for the memories of a rat and an assassin? Do you think I want them?” She bit her lip, trying to control the shuddering in her voice, “So NO, I won’t help you. I won’t be your project or your tool.”

Kaoru shut her eyes tightly, trying desperately to hold her tears and her choked sobs in. Kenshin stared at her, he eyes wide and angry.

“Well,” Takasugi announced, rising, “That was interesting.” He turned to the door. “I’ll be off now. You should get ready for your assignment,” he added to Kenshin.

Kenshin nodded and Takasugi let himself out of the apartment, locking the door from the outside.

“I thought only you had keys,” Kaoru bit out sarcastically, rising to her knees.

Kenshin ignored her completely and walked over to where his short sword was embedded in the wall. He pulled the sword from the wall and pushed it back into its sheath with a loud click. Silently, he struck a match, tossed it into the fireplace and waited for the flames to spring up.

Meanwhile, Kaoru had curled herself up and was leaning against the sofa, brushing the tears away from her cheeks and steadying her breathing. She turned to watch Kenshin.

He fished the black envelope from his pocket and pulled out the slip of paper within. He read the words and committed them to memory.

10 p.m. Shobi Building, South Sanjo. Takeda Kanryu.

Kenshin tossed the envelope and its contents into the fire, watching it burn for a moment before grabbing his belt. He wrapped the belt around his waist and tucked both swords through it - first the short and then the long. Walking past Kaoru, he picked up his long black cloak that was still on the coffee table from the night before and threw it over his shoulders, carefully flipping the thick black material over the swords. He then pulled on his black wrist guards, fitting the covers for the back of his hands carefully. Kenshin glided through the room and unlocked the door. He slipped out without even looking back.

Kaoru heard the door lock on her and she let her head fall to her knees.

Alone, again.

“Katsura-san?”

“Yes?”

“It’s me. Takasugi Shinsaku.”

“How did it go, Shinsaku?”

“As expected, sir. She took everything from him - all the information, all the sensations.”

“Interesting. So her ability is actually much greater than we originally thought.”

“Yes. But she’s not able to handle it.”

“I see. And what of their interaction?”

“Interesting to say the least, Katsura-san.”

“What do you mean by that, Shinsaku?”

“He was affected deeply. I’ve never seen him almost lose it like that.”

“Anger?”

“Yes.”

“Interesting.”

“Should we move her to a safe house now, Katsura-san?”

“No. Leave her there.”

“You won’t be able to use her if she’s dead, sir.”

“He won’t kill her.”

“How can you be sure?”

“He isn’t able to.”

A pause.

“As you wish, sir.”

“Arrange the meeting then.”

“Yes.”

Katsura Kogoro placed the phone back in its cradle and leaned back in his chair. He sighed deeply. It was too bad that the ends of his plans required such difficult means. But, it had to be done.

9:45 p.m.

Battousai glided through the night, attracting attention from the clubbers and drinkers for his shocking red hair but for nothing else. He ignored them all, making straight for the Shobi Building.

Suddenly a scantily clad woman attached herself to his arm, pulling at his cloak.

“Come on, big guy,” she crooned seductively, “I’ll give you a night to remember.”

The prostitute started to slide her hands into Battousai’s cloak. Glancing sidelong at the heavily made up woman, he suddenly pushed her away forcefully. She fell backwards into a pile of wooden crates. Without looking back, he suddenly sprinted away into the darkness.

Battousai headed for the quieter alleys, counting the minutes.

Kaoru stood slowly and looked for a light switch. She flicked off all the lights, letting darkness fill the apartment. She turned slowly and faced the glowing red embers of the fireplace.

9:59 p.m.

Battousai slowed to a walk and rounded the final corner. The Shobi building was right in front of him. His amber eyes narrowed as he searched the empty streets. He saw the doors to a seedy nightclub open and a tall suited man stepped out, flanked by two hulking bodyguards.

Kaoru threaded her way carefully around the furniture and knelt before the fire, gazing into the hypnotic sparks and flames. She let her mind wander, the memories of many washing over her.

10:01 p.m.

Battousai stepped into the light of a solitary street lamp, directly in the path of the three men who had just exited the nightclub.

“You must be the drug dealer, Takeda Kanryu.”

Takeda regarded the black clothed man with interest. He chuckled softly. “Were you waiting for me?”

“Nothing personal,” Battousai said unemotionally, “But I’m afraid I will have to take your lives.”

“Will you?” Takeda smirked, “And who might you be?”

“Choshu’s Himura Battousai,” Kenshin answered coldly, flicking his sword out with his thumb.

“How arrogant to give your name to-”

The man was cut off suddenly as Battousai rushed forward, his hand on the hilt of his sword.

Kaoru closed her eyes and let slow tears trickle from her cheeks. She wept for the dead, empathizing with their dying pains as the heat from the fire before her burned at her cheeks. She let all the foreign memories brush lightly against her mind. One particular sensation latched onto her consciousness - insanity. Insanity and blood. She picked at the sensation, curious as to its nature and purpose. Suddenly, her mind reeled away from the sensation in fright. The insanity of bloodlust was trying to consume her, even as she shoved it away.

The first bodyguard did not even have time to draw his handgun from inside his suit jacket. Battousai’s long sword flashed out from the sheath and, as he flew past the bodyguard, the sword caught the man in the side, tearing through his stomach and intestines. The man vomited blood and fell forward, dead.

The second bodyguard began shooting almost right away. Battousai rushed at the man, ducking below the bullets. Before the man even knew it, Battousai was under his raised gun arm. He crouched and spun on one leg, his sword swinging upwards. He twisted the handle mid-swing and the blade sliced through the bodyguard’s spine and cut through his jaw. The headless man crumpled to the ground in a messy heap. His blood spurted from his neck and sprayed onto Battousai’s cloak.

Battousai stood and looked over his shoulder to where Takeda Kanryu stood, cowering in fear. Blood dripping from his sword, Battousai turned and faced him, eyes emotionless.

“No,” Takeda pleaded hysterically, “You can have whatever you want. Anything. You name it - I’ll get it for you!”

Battousai didn’t answer. Instead, he lifted his sword and drew it back into a lunge position, blood dripping from the blade and running onto his hands. He silently dashed forward, his eyes intent on Takeda. Takeda cried out frantically in fright and turned to run away. Battousai leapt into the air, transferring his sword to point downwards. Pushing down at the top of the hilt, Battousai plunged the blade into Takeda’s skull as he ran. Takeda’s body immediately went limp, more blood spraying upwards and hitting Battousai in the face. He flipped away from the body, his sword ripping through the back of his victim’s skull. Battousai landed a few feet away.

Eyes shadowed, Battousai stood and, after flicking the blood from his sword, he sheathed it and tucked the hilt back under his cloak. Without looking back, he disappeared into the night, leaving behind a street stained with rivers of blood and littered with three brutally murdered bodies.

When Kenshin unlocked his apartment door and pushed it open, he found it in a state of semi-darkness. Easily adjusting his eyes to the dim light, he saw the dark form of a kneeling figure outlined by the red glow of a dying fire. He closed the door behind him and locked it loudly.

Kaoru heard him enter but did not move and kept her eyes calmly trained upon the fire. Kenshin walked across the room and shrugged his bloodied cloak from his shoulders, tossing it onto the table as always. He pulled off his wrist guards, watching in distaste as some of the dried blood flaked off in the process. Pulling his swords from his belt, he stepped up to the fireplace and stood beside Kaoru’s still figure. He lifted the swords and delicately placed them on their respective racks.

“How many died by your hand tonight?” came a soft, calm question from below him.

Kenshin glanced down at her bowed head. “It’s none of your business.”

Raising her blue eyes to meet his, Kaoru lifted herself from the floor. Kenshin met her gaze and his eyes followed hers as she slowly stood in front of him.

“Do you ever feel anything? Remorse? Grief? Guilt?”

Kenshin forced himself to stare into her eyes levelly. “You wouldn’t understand.”

“Of course I wouldn’t,” Kaoru smiled sadly, and turned away, “I couldn’t never take pleasure in others’ pain as you do.”

“You don’t understand,” Kenshin said, his voice suddenly strained.

“I don’t?” Kaoru asked, looking back with a small smirk, “But remember, Battousai, I know what you do. You are all the same. You’re a tool like that pervert Genji. An assassin without feeling or conscience - killing for pleasure and for business.”

All of a sudden, Kenshin’s hand was at her throat and he pushed her back into the wall. Kaoru reached up and grabbed at his bloodied wrist with both hands.

“You don’t understand,” he snarled angrily, “I don’t kill for pleasure. I kill so that naïve, selfish people like you never have to see violence in your prissy neighbourhoods.”

“I don’t believe you,” Kaoru choked out, defiantly glaring into his burning eyes, “You’re just a mindless killing machine, a bloody pervert - like the rest of them.”

“Is that what you think?” Kenshin seethed, the orange firelight creating fearsome patterns on his face, “Then should I fulfill your expectations just because you have them?”

Kenshin viciously spun her around, pushing her up against the wall. He planted a hand on her back and pinned her to the wall harshly. Pushing his body up against her painfully, his other hand tore at her bathrobe and pushed up her thigh.

Suddenly, he froze.

Kaoru was deathly silent, her entire body still. Kenshin was also frozen in place, his hand still on her upper thigh and his body still pressed closely to hers. He couldn’t see her eyes but he could feel her ragged breathing through her back and the wild beating of her heart.

And yet, she was still as stone. Kenshin watched, entranced, as a single tear rolled down her smooth cheek. And then another slid down her cheek, pooling with the first tear at the base of her jaw. Then, the weight of both tears dragged the tiny bubble of water down until they dropped from her face in a perfect sphere.

Kenshin disengaged himself from the girl, stepping back with his hands lifted in front of him. He stared at his calloused, blood encrusted hands. Feeling his breath begin to race, he spun around suddenly and hurried to the bathroom. He slammed the door behind him and immediately beginning running hot water. He stripped from his bloody clothes as quickly as he could. Pulling the shower plug, he rushed into the hot water. The water scalded his skin but he took it, pulling his hair tie out wildly and opening his arms up to the stream of burning water.

After the blood had been washed down the drain, Kenshin cut the water. He stood in the shower stall with his fists clenched tightly, letting the still steaming water drip from his body. He closed his eyes tightly - the shame still not cleansed.

He had assaulted a mere teenager - a girl probably ten years younger than himself. He pounded a tiled wall with his clenched fist, ignoring the pain that shot through his knuckles. She was a mere child.

Shaking the water from his loose hair, he shoved the shower door open and stepped out. Pulling his blue robe around him, he threw the door to the bathroom open and marched out. He froze at the entrance to the main living area.

She was still standing there, unmoving as a statue. But he noticed the jump in her shoulders as he stepped forward. Kenshin approached the living area slowly.

“Go to bed,” he ordered her quietly, drawing near her and reaching out a tentative hand.

She flinched and drew back, turning to stare at him fearfully. Kenshin retracted his hand quickly. He stepped backwards slowly, moving away from her trembling form. He sank down into his armchair and stretched out his arms on the armrests.

“Sleep,” he repeated his command.

Kaoru simply lowered herself into a huddled ball on the sofa. Kenshin sighed inaudibly and bowed his head, commanding his body to rest and his mind to sleep.

Kenshin dreamed of blood. He dreamed of wielding his sword and killing those he was assigned to. He relived their deaths, one by one. But in his nightmare, the dead did not fall. They kept rising, their bodies mangled and bloody. The bodies threw themselves at Kenshin and he had to slice through them to keep them away. The smell of blood was intoxicating, filling his system and clouding his mind. He screamed, hacking through the bodies madly.

Soft footfalls alerted Kenshin to movement in his apartment in the dead of night. His body automatically tensed to spring as he waited, eyes closed.

Soft breaths on his face.

A slight tugging at the chain around his neck.

Kenshin’s amber eyes suddenly snapped open. His hand darted out with lightning speed and seized the wrist of his assailant.

“Let me go!”

Kenshin’s head snapped up, surprised at the feminine voice. Of course, he berated himself, it was only the girl. Still, he did not let go of her wrist and she pulled at it in vain.

“What do you want?” he demanded quietly.

“Let me leave,” she pleaded angrily, “I don’t want to stay here anymore!”

“I’m sorry,” Kenshin apologized emotionlessly, “I can’t do that.”

“Why?” she cried, “Because you’ve been ordered to?”

“Just calm down and nothing will happen to you.”

“You mean until you’re ordered to kill me again,” Kaoru laughed bitterly as she continued to tug at her captured wrist, “Or until you lose your cool and lash out at me. Maybe you’ll use one of those swords. Or maybe you’ll strangle me like you almost did before.”

He released her wrist suddenly and she tumbled to the floor backwards. Backing up against the sofa, Kaoru stared through the darkness at Kenshin. The fire had not completely burned out and Kaoru could still make out the outline of his face and the fiery red of his long hair falling over his shoulders. His catlike eyes shone in the faint glow of the fire.

But his expression was not stony as it usually was. Instead, Kaoru noted with wide eyes, his eyes were half-lidded with some emotion akin to guilt. She rubbed her sore wrist. She watched as the slight hint of emotion passed over his severe features.

Was he struggling with himself? When Genji’s memories had overcome her, Kaoru had experienced the moment when his mind gave up control and decency; when he had let himself tumble into carnal pleasure and emotion. Had her captor not yet fallen so far?

Kenshin also observed her through the orange shadows. Even in the darkness, he could see her emotions as plain as day. The teenager was not capable of hiding her emotions. They were always written clearly on her face - no matter how odd they seemed. And right now, confusion filled her dark eyes.

Kaoru turned away quickly from his intense stare. She could no longer compare him with Genji’s memories. Somehow, they were completely different even though they had the same occupation. The only strain of memory that Kaoru could pin to both was a strange obsession with blood. Her curiosity overwhelmed her and she felt compelled to discover the nature of the assassin’s personality.

“Before,” Kaoru asked quietly, “Why did you say that?”

“What?”

“About killing so that people in prissy neighbourhoods would never see violence?”

Kenshin snorted softly in the darkness, “You wouldn’t understand.”

“Did you choose to be an assassin?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because I am skilled enough to accomplish what is necessary.”

“Necessary for what?”

“Controlling society,” Kenshin answered carefully.

Kaoru knit her eyebrows together. “I am not sure I understand.”

“I told you that you wouldn’t.”

A silent pause filled the dark room.

“Do you find it hard?” Kaoru asked curiously.

“What?”

“You know,” she began, “controlling the insanity.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Well,” she answered, talking slowly into the darkness, “When I received Genji’s memories, I became aware of his insanity. He was always teetering on the edge. But at some point, I think he just went crazy. Or, gave in to blood lust. Or something like that - his mind was so frightening.”

“Yes.”

“Yes what?”

“Yes,” Kenshin said, taking a deep breath, “I find it hard to control the insanity that comes with being an assassin.”

“I see.”

For a few minutes, all that could be heard was breathing. Realization began to dawn on the teenager. Using the carnal mind of Genji as a reference, Kaoru began to appreciate the struggle against the insanity of bloodlust. Kaoru broke the silence once again.

“Do you enjoy your occupation?”

“Didn’t you ask me that already?”

“Well, you never really answered.”

“Fine then,” Kenshin muttered softly, “No. I don’t. Are you satisfied now?”

Kaoru ignored his last statement and peered through the darkness at him. “It’s easier now, isn’t it?”

“What is?”

“In the dark,” Kaoru explained, “It’s easier for you to talk in the dark.”

Kenshin shrugged, knowing she could make out the outline of his body.

“Why are you always so cold?”

“Why do you want to know all of this so suddenly?”

Kaoru shrugged. “Is it to stop the bloodlust? Keep the insanity away?”

“I thought you could just label me a cold-hearted monster and leave it at that.”

“I’ll never understand you,” Kaoru sighed, twirling a strand of her hair.

“As I have repeatedly told you.”

“But,” she continued, looking up to meet his golden eyes in the semi-darkness, “Having meditated on Genji’s emotions and memories, I can appreciate your struggle.”

Kenshin arched a dark eyebrow at her. Kaoru crawled towards the base of his armchair, holding his eyes with her own. He stared down at her, letting his mask of impassiveness drop onto his face as she sat on the floor right beside his leg.

“Just for tonight,” Kaoru whispered up at him, “Just for tonight, let me sympathize with your struggle.”

She reached up and turned one his hands over. She traced her soft fingertips over his palm, pressing down slightly on the calluses caused by the sword.

“Tomorrow,” she murmured, “Tomorrow we can be enemies again.”

Kaoru’s fingers gently left his hand and she turned to face the fireplace, still reclining on one hip beside his leg.

“But for just now,” she sighed, “Let me be a part of your fight for sanity.”

Gently, and very gingerly, Kaoru leaned the side of her head upon Kenshin’s knee. She closed her eyes slowly, letting her last sight for the night be the glowing red embers.

Kenshin lifted his palm up and stared at it. And then he stared down at the girl’s head on his knee. Inhaling deeply, he threaded his fingers through his bangs and rested his forehead on his palm, leaning his elbow on the armrest. Then he also let his eyes drift close, noticing hazily that for the first time in a long while, the stench of blood was not assaulting his mind.

Just before his eyes closed completely, he felt tiny droplets of wetness just where Kaoru’s eyes would be resting on his knee. His mind registered her tears distantly. It also registered an unfamiliar sentiment.

Comfort.

It didn’t matter, he rationalized to himself.

After all, it would be just for one night.