This fan fiction is based on the Rurouni Kenshin manga. Rurouni Kenshin characters are the property of creator Nobohiro Watsuke, Shueisha, Shonen Jump, Sony Entertainment, and VIZ Comics. This is a non-profit work for entertainment purposes only. Permission was not obtained from the above parties.
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Recovery: Chapter 8 - Outing at the Aoiya


by Haku Baikou ::: 20.Mar.2003


Ken-san's reaction to the news regarding Shishio's men had been exactly as Megumi had feared. The very next morning, the rurouni had begun to push himself, trying to stand up on his own, to regain his lost strength. He didn't exactly make it and ended up having to crawl on all fours as he'd done the evening before when he'd sensed Shirojou on the roof. That was how Megumi had found him the next morning: a lump on the floor, shaky, and somewhat embarrassed at having been caught out of bed.

She hadn't bothered chastising him. Had merely sighed, knowing it would be of no use. If Ken-san had it in his head to kill himself trying to get well, then he'd do it with or without anyone's aid (and to the winds with Megumi's wasted admonishments). So, she'd decided to help him with this folly despite her better judgment. Her only condition was that he try his little experiments near the futon so that should he fall, he would have something soft to land on and not damage himself too badly. After all, she'd worked far too hard on his injuries all this time for her efforts to be undone by this foolishness. Noting the dangerous, disapproving glint in her eyes, Ken-san had meekly agreed to her stipulation with a softly murmured "Hai, de gozaru".

She'd helped him up then, taking his hands in hers and supporting him as he pulled himself unsteadily to his feet. And then she'd waited patiently while he closed his eyes waiting a moment for the world to stop spinning. He'd tried to take a step, but his knees had buckled, and Megumi was barely able to keep the swordsman from falling flat on his face. The rurouni's small frame was heavier than she'd expected, and Megumi had never been strong physically. By the time she'd managed to get him back on his futon, his breathing was labored and his hands shook.

"Ken-san, you can't expect to have your strength and energy back so soon, especially when you've bled so much," she'd said gently, seeing the grim look of disappointment and frustration plainly on his face. "One would never try to build a fire without wood. This is no different, right? You can't build your strength when you're so low on blood. And it takes time to get well, especially when you've been in bed for so long."

"Sessha never took this long to recover back in the days of the Bakumatsu." His tone was strained, almost peevish.

"You were never hurt this badly before, Ken-san," she countered. "And," she added wryly in her best Fox Lady voice, "You were never twenty-eight before. You're almost twice the age you were back then, you know. Ancient One."

He had grimaced and laughed then, softly, ruefully. But his equilibrium was back mentally if not physically, and he'd taken her advice to heart and slowed down to a reasonable pace after that.

That had been a week ago. He had steadily improved since then. More so than Megumi thought possible considering the damned wound in his side was still bleeding. He really ought to have died with the amount of blood he'd lost, but leave it to Ken-san to do the impossible and somehow manage to defy generations of medical teachings and get better anyway.

He was sitting, back against the window sill watching the people below in the streets, when Megumi came into the room to change his dressings. He leaned heavily on the sakabatou and moved as slowly and carefully as an old man, but he was walking on his own, unassisted, and seated himself on his futon without too much difficulty.

"Ohayou, Ken-san," she said as she set the small basket of bandages down. "Could you get the salve for me while I boil some water? You know where it's at?"

"Hai," he said as he sifted through the containers in her medicine box.

Megumi smiled to herself as she lit a flame for the water. She had guessed Ken-san would be up early this morning. Megumi had finally deemed him well enough to go out for a while, and today, the rurouni was to leave the confines of the Shirobeko for the first time since he was brought in after the battle. Ken-san had been pent up in his sickroom for two and a half weeks, and restlessness was gradually winning out over patience. So a trip had been arranged as a treat. The police would be here soon with a carriage to take them on a visit to the Aoiya. Sanosuke had stayed behind this morning and would be helping Megumi with Ken-san and with the huge picnic Sae had miraculously whipped up for them. Megumi had brought a substantial amount of food to the Aoiya the last time she visited, but today's lunch would put the last one to shame, so Sae boasted.

"Megumi-dono?"

Something in his voice made her turn around, and as she did so, Megumi suddenly stopped what she was doing. Ken-san held a little black lacquered vial in his hand. It was the bottle Hiko had requested when the rurouni had been in the throes of delirium. Idiot! Megumi thought to herself. She had all but forgotten about the perfume.

"Is this yours?" Ken-san asked.

"Hai," she said, trying to sound casual. "It's white plum perfume," she said lamely. At least she'd managed to make her voice sound quite ordinary.

He stared at the little bottle and spoke haltingly, apprehensively. "Did sessha ever say anything... inappropriate when sessha was sick?"

Megumi sighed. Kenshin's swordsman's sense was (unfortunately) back in full force, and he'd detected something in her voice after all. It would be difficult to lie to him anymore. He'd sense it if she were to hide anything from him.

"You did mention a few names. There was one that seemed to upset you, and Hiko-san thought this perfume would help. He wouldn't explain why though."

"Shishou?" He lifted his eyebrows in surprise at that.

"Hai," she nodded. And then took a risk. "You said a name, Ken-san. You kept calling out for Tomoe."

The rurouni became very still of a sudden.

Megumi continued rapidly before Ken-san could say or think anything else. "I don't know who she was, Ken-san. And I'm not going to ask. But if it helps any...." and here, she continued completely on a guess, on gut instinct, "If it helps any, Kaoru wasn't here when you said it. And we've never mentioned it to her."

"She wasn't here." He sounded relieved. And then: "We?"

"Okina, Sae, and myself," she admitted. "We were all here. But none of us have spoken of it since. You have many secrets, Ken-san. Someday I hope you'll tell us about some of them, but for now...we understand."

His eyes were grateful as he looked at her. "Arigatou, Megumi-dono," he said softly.

She studied her hands, hiding her face. There were very few people in this world who could make Takani Megumi blush like a little girl. She laughed nervously and shook her head.

"Anyway," she said, changing the subject, getting back to the business at hand. "Let's get this dressing change over with, neh? And then we can be on our way. I'm sure everyone is waiting for us, and I'm sure you'll be most impressed with what they've done so far. Okina-san says the repairs ought to be complete by next week. That's pretty quick, isn't it, considering they're rebuilding an entire restaurant and hotel. And won't it be lovely to have lunch in the sunshine, Ken-san? I'm sure you're looking forward to that. Sae has packed enough baskets to feed a small army."

She was babbling like an idiot, she knew. But at least the awkwardness was gone between them, and Ken-san seemed amused, content to listen to her chatty banter as she worked. She and Ken-san had become rather adept with the dressings changes by now. He lifted his arms, turned this way and that, and handed her the salves and bandages at the right times automatically. As always, the bandages came away bloody, but Megumi was determined not to let her worries dampen her mood this morning. She had plenty of other concerns and didn't need to drag both of them down with depressing pessimism. She tried to focus on the positive. Ken-san didn't seem to be in as much pain today. And the oozing did seem a bit less. And wasn't Ken-san doing well despite the hole in his side? There was nothing to do but to continue with her treatments the best she could, so that's what Megumi did.

Sanosuke arrived with their transportation soon after. "Oi, Kenshin, Kitsune-onna!" the street fighter called up to them from the street below.

Megumi hurried to the window. "Stop shouting, baka! The whole neighborhood will hear you," she said, failing to keep the amusement from her voice. "We'll be down in a minute." But the young fighter was too impatient to wait outside, and soon, his footsteps could be heard coming quickly up the stairs.

"Hurry, will you? I've got news to tell," he said frowning intensely. He hooked an arm about the rurouni and half dragged, half carried the poor swordsman down the stairs at a rate that was far too dangerous for Megumi's liking. ("Sano! That's too fast, de gozaru!" A muffled protest from a flustered rurouni.) Megumi couldn't help envisioning the two men tumbling down the remainder of the steps in a blur of pink and white. She murmured "baka" under her breath as she took the stairs at a much saner pace.

Megumi was amused to note that the carriage was driven by the same eager young officer who had accompanied her the last time. He was busy helping Sae load the carriage with an astonishing and somewhat daunting array of baskets.

"Are we all going to fit in there?" she asked dubiously.

"No problem," said Sanosuke as he helped a slightly dizzy and overwhelmed Ken-san into the carriage. "I'm going to be sitting on the top outside." With that, he gave Megumi a quick, meaningful little look and indicated the rooftops with a little tilt of his head. His face was turned away from Sae, and the look in his eye was serious, at odds with the tone of his voice.

Megumi nodded in understanding. Sanosuke was worried. Safety was a concern. And Megumi did not need to be told to keep an eye open this time. Not after the lesson she learned on their last trip back from the Aoiya. She still had nightmares of the attack, could still feel the chill kiss of steel against her neck at times when she was alone in her room at night. She'd thought about it this morning, but had steadily kept it out of her mind, distracting herself with other matters so that the worry wouldn't show too plainly on her face. Ken-san could pick up on her concerns. That couldn't be helped. But he didn't necessarily have to know the extent of her fears. He didn't have to see just how worried she was.

She looked up at Rooster Head, still moving about in a flurry of activity, and she suddenly realized that he had whisked Ken-san down the stairs the way he did for a reason. He had hoped to distract the rurouni, to keep Ken-san from picking up on the tension, to protect the swordsman and prevent him from wanting to help them. Megumi shook her head in reluctant approval. It would take some getting used, this strange Sanosuke who was actually capable of intelligent reasoning. And with that thought in mind, Megumi averted her face, hiding an amused little smirk from the street fighter as she climbed quickly into the carriage after Ken-san.

"Sanosuke-san, there's no need to sit outside," said Sae watching as Sanosuke settled himself, long legs dangling from the back of the carriage. "There's plenty of room inside. Really, why sit up there?"

"To enjoy the sunshine and have a better view," he answered. To keep an eye out for the enemy, was the added implication. Poor Sae, thought Megumi fondly. A wise and kind woman in her own fashion, but so terribly innocent in other ways. She wasn't an old hand at danger and intrigue like the rest of them were. She didn't have the battle instinct for suspicion that many of them shared.

What a sorry lot they all were, thought Megumi smiling to herself. Her friends seemed to attract danger and malice like flies to honey.

Megumi heard Sanosuke rap his knuckles against the top of the carriage, signaling the young officer to go. "That's it. We're ready!" he said.

And with that, they were off. "See you later, Tae!--("That's Sae!" the proprietress called from the doorway.)--Whatever, you both have the same face!"

Megumi watched the buildings fly by, trying to enjoy the ride, trying to relax, trying not to think of shadowy figures lurking on rooftops.

"Megumi-dono, everything will be all right," said Ken-san gently from his corner of the carriage.

Why did they even bother trying to hide things from him, she thought to herself as she smiled at the rurouni. He always seemed to know what everyone was thinking no matter how hard they tried to hide things from him. They all wanted to protect him, and yet they never quite succeeded completely. It wasn't in Ken-san's nature to accept the help they offered without offering at least something of himself in return.

"Sano won't let anything happen to us," he continued with quiet confidence. "And Sessha has the sakabatou. But if sessha isn't strong enough to wield it, then you can come to the rescue with your knife."

How in the world did Ken-san know about her little knife? She had carried it with her ever since the attack. Megumi wasn't sure why she always kept it with her. It wasn't as if she could use it. That had been painfully apparent during her encounter with the spy. But still, it gave her a sense of comfort knowing it was there, and she was more grateful to Sanosuke for the considerate gift than the street fighter would ever really know.

"Now, you're teasing me, Ken-san," she said.

Kenshin merely smiled and leaned his head back. He was soon absorbed by his view from the carriage window and seemed to forget anyone was there with him.

How he loved to people-watch, thought Megumi. He seemed content for the most part, but the physician in Megumi, accustomed to years of searching faces for signs of pain, thought she saw a trace of sorrow in the rurouni's eyes. It saddened her to see him gazing wistfully thus at the world. She knew he felt himself to be forever closed off from the rest of humanity, doomed to be an outsider simply by way of having experienced too much, of having lost the innocence and sense of security and rightness of the world that normal people took for granted. Even were he to atone for all his past transgressions, Kenshin would never experience the world the way others did. He would forever view it through a filter of his own tainted past.

It was something Megumi could understand herself, for she'd gained a similar view of life during her time making opium for Kanryu. Her experiences, though painful, were not on the same scale as Ken-san's, but they were enough to allow her to imagine what he must feel. And perhaps this shared perception was what set her apart from the others. Perhaps it was why Ken-san was so uncharacteristically open with her sometimes. (Well, not completely open, but relatively so, at least.) He didn't feel the need to shield her, to put on the cheerful rurouni mask that he so often did for Kaoru and Yahiko, and to an extent, even Sanosuke. Those three, despite painful pasts and battle experiences, still retained that innocence that Ken-san had long ago lost. Their hands weren't stained with blood, and they retained an unsullied outlook on life, an optimism of the new Meiji era, bought and paid for by the souls of those who paved the way, those such as the Hitokiri Battousai.

Megumi sometimes found consolation in the thought that though she wasn't the one closest to Ken-san's heart, the redhead at least allowed her to see him as his most true self. Not that the carefree rurouni or the battle-hardened Battousai weren't real; they most certainly were. But they were polar manifestations of his deeper, true being, defenses against too much pain. Or, strangely enough, too much happiness.

Megumi understood those defenses, for they were akin to her own. The rurouni and the Battousai were not all that different from the flirtatious Fox Lady or the Reserved Doctor façade that Megumi herself so often employed. And the double-sided fear of pain and joy, this too, she could well understand. Ken-san was afraid that the good times wouldn't last, that his loved ones would be lost. That such losses would most likely be his fault somehow, either by something he did in the present, or more likely, something he'd done in the past. He was afraid to feel too good. He was afraid of the unfamiliar, gut-wrenching fluttery sensation of being assaulted by emotions that, until recently, had been rare and almost alien to him: joy, comfort, trust, acceptance...love.

Those fears allowed a closeness between herself and the rurouni that the others would never know. But those same fears were also what kept Kenshin and Megumi apart, why in her heart she knew Kenshin would never be hers. Even if he had never met Kaoru, it still wouldn't be possible, for he couldn't be happy with a woman who shared a similar past as himself. He wouldn't be able to tolerate looking into her eyes and seeing all his sins mirrored in her own, flung right back at him. Neither of them could ever know peace together. And so, Himura Kenshin sought Kaoru instead for comfort, and Takani Megumi turned to....

She frowned. Who exactly did she turn to? Sanosuke? The thought hung in her mind, making her feel warm and a little scared simultaneously. Odd that she had never actively thought about her relationship with the street fighter before. She'd just taken his presence for granted like she'd done with so many other comforts lately. What exactly was their relationship, she wondered. He annoyed her, certainly. Quite often at that. And yet she missed his company when he wasn't around....

"Megumi-dono?" A worried voice. "Is she all right?"

"Hey! Kitsune, we've arrived. Oi!" Sanosuke was waving his hand in front of her face.

She blinked. "Hai hai, baka! I was just thinking about things. Get your hand out of my face, please."

"Perhaps it's not good to think quite so hard," said the rurouni, concerned.

"Which is exactly why I never do that," said Sanosuke, yawning and stretching under the bright morning sky.

Megumi wondered if Rooster Head set himself up for insults on purpose. He made it so temptingly easy. It took all her self-control not to say anything. And to think she had actually thought him capable of intelligent thought....

Yahiko was once again the first to greet them, and he eagerly took Kenshin by the arm, dragging the rurouni on an abbreviated version of the tour he'd given to Megumi before. They'd ended the tour in Okina's garden, and Ken-san had settled himself comfortably on the porch, enjoying the peace and quiet (except for the hammering, pounding, shouting, and noisy shenanigans of Yahiko and Misao) in the hours before lunch.

Kaoru and Megumi then managed to get Sae's impressive picnic set up on the garden porch, and soon they were all enjoying a fine meal that, indeed, put the previous one to shame. Okina and Hiko joined them soon after, having walked from the Shirobeko (since not everyone had a carriage at their disposal). And soon, Okina, happily drunk on Hiko's sake, was warbling a tune that no one other than himself could recognize. They all tried to look appreciative of the old man's efforts, though it was somewhat difficult to keep from giggling.

It was in the middle of this merriment that Misao suddenly stood up, interrupting Okina's performance. The Oniwaban girl's eyes lit up and she grinned, happy as Megumi had ever seen her. "Aoshi-sama!" she breathed, her excitement nearly palpable. And the rest of them turned to find the former okashira standing alone at the edge of the garden, back straight, face unreadable as ever.

Megumi made an effort not to frown. Shinomori was not one of her favorite people in the world. He had, after all, threatened her with death on more than one occasion. But for the sake of the others, especially the ebullient Misao, she kept her opinions to herself. Secretly, however, she wished he'd remained at the temple or wherever he had been hermitting for the last couple of weeks. He could meditate until the end of the world for all she cared. His presence always made her uncomfortable.

Aoshi joined them for lunch, not quite ignoring all the welcome-back's and the good-to-see-you's that were thrown his way, but not quite acknowledging them either. He sat at a slight distance from the others, not bothering to join in the conversation. Megumi had to admit, though, that for all his stony silence, the man's expression seemed softer somehow, a little less glacial than the last time she'd seen him. And the obvious joy his presence brought to Misao was impossible to ignore. For that, and for the fact that he had, at the very end, helped Ken-san in his fight against Shishio...for those reasons, Megumi could consider forgiving him. Someday. When she was ready. But not quite today.

After lunch, an exhausted Kenshin napped in the sunlight on a futon they'd brought out from one of the rooms upstairs. Megumi and Kaoru set about quietly cleaning up the remains of the picnic. Shinomori-oddly enough-stopped to speak briefly with Sanosuke while the others got back to work. Megumi couldn't help overhearing bits of their conversation. They spoke in low tones, but didn't seem to be actively trying to hide their conversation from anyone. So Megumi felt no guilt for eavesdropping.

"Have you told them?" She heard Shinomori ask in his cool monotone.

"No, not yet," said Sanosuke, glancing her way, looking slightly embarrassed.

"Tell us what?" asked Megumi, unable to keep silent any longer.

Sanosuke turned to look at her, his brown eyes frowning, looking as if he'd rather be anywhere else on the planet than where he was at the present. Shinomori's face was its typical blank slate.

"Yes, tell us what?" Kaoru joined in.

"I spoke with one of the police officers this morning when I was getting the carriage," said Sanosuke slowly. "It seems someone broke into their armory yesterday-"

"What?!?" Kaoru dropped the cup she'd been cleaning.

Sanosuke cleared his throat uncomfortably. "And, uh, they think it was Shishio's men," he muttered, barely intelligibly.

"Are you sure?" asked Megumi.

"Our sources confirm it," answered Shinomori's cold voice. So, thought Megumi, the former okashira had been doing a little more than just meditating lately.

It figured. It damn well figured. It figured that Shinomori didn't come over to lunch just for a social call. It figured that Hiko and Okina felt it necessary for safety's sake to join them at the Aoiya. It figured that Sanosuke (Baka. Baka!) and the others in the know hadn't had the heart to say anything sooner.

Megumi closed her eyes, willing herself to remain calm, to not throw a fit of hysterics right then and there.

The attack by Shishio's men was imminent, then. They had wondered what the enemy was planning, had lived in constant fear of assault. And now, finally....

Finally, it was just a matter of time.

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